10. You feel like you want to cry. You don't know why you feel like you want to cry, but for some strange reason you feel that crying might feel good!!!
9. You are tired, fatigued, and sufficiently spent for no apparent reason.
8. You cry because elevators are so helpful and useful and you are so grateful to live in an age when they exist.
7. You find your ability to balance is a bit off.
6. You cry because strawberries taste so good. (You must have eaten Japanese strawberries to fully understand this.)
5. Your social filter is either clogged and needs fixing, or has been altogether lost and who knows what you might say.
4. You cry because you are soooo tired.
3. You go to Costco and develop a strong desire to eat while shopping. You manage to fill a cart and a half of food, all the while salavating. Then when you get home the very thought of eating is distasteful to you. You also realize that your small Japanese refrigerator cannot possibly hold all the food you just purchased!
2. You cry because your Japanese refrigerator seems to be shrinking.
And the number one reason why you suspect you might be pregnant:
1. You go to the salon for a simple trim but while there you decide to add a straightening perm around your hairline and a body perm to your crown. Your stilist raises his eyebrows but agrees (and since he doesn't speak English he may think your crazy but can't tell you). Then, after a great deal of time and a sizeable salon bill, you go home and cry that you hate your hair...
So to fix it you pull out a pair of kitchen siccors and cut some short bangs because you are sure that you want a Reese Witherspoon fringe (you think that looking like Reese Witherspoon will make you feel better)... Never mind that you clearly do NOT know how to cut hair AND you don't look ANYTHING like Reese Witherspoon. All the while your children watch and ask what you are doing... to which you quickly respond that they are NEVER, EVER to cut their own hair...
You finish the job and stand back... Then... you cry... Reese Witherspoon... what were you thinking???... You're not even blond... HELLO!!!...
You're husband gets home and after hearing about your day rushes out to get a pregnancy test... As the positive result slowly starts to show you are BOTH grateful to learn that no, you are not on the verge of a mental breakdown... Science CAN explain this one...
You consider buying or ordering a t-shirt with the following statement on the front AND back: Beware of Hormonally Imbalanced Female
(actually you might have that statement printed on everything you own... hm... there's a thought!)9. You are tired, fatigued, and sufficiently spent for no apparent reason.
8. You cry because elevators are so helpful and useful and you are so grateful to live in an age when they exist.
7. You find your ability to balance is a bit off.
6. You cry because strawberries taste so good. (You must have eaten Japanese strawberries to fully understand this.)
5. Your social filter is either clogged and needs fixing, or has been altogether lost and who knows what you might say.
4. You cry because you are soooo tired.
3. You go to Costco and develop a strong desire to eat while shopping. You manage to fill a cart and a half of food, all the while salavating. Then when you get home the very thought of eating is distasteful to you. You also realize that your small Japanese refrigerator cannot possibly hold all the food you just purchased!
2. You cry because your Japanese refrigerator seems to be shrinking.
And the number one reason why you suspect you might be pregnant:
1. You go to the salon for a simple trim but while there you decide to add a straightening perm around your hairline and a body perm to your crown. Your stilist raises his eyebrows but agrees (and since he doesn't speak English he may think your crazy but can't tell you). Then, after a great deal of time and a sizeable salon bill, you go home and cry that you hate your hair...
So to fix it you pull out a pair of kitchen siccors and cut some short bangs because you are sure that you want a Reese Witherspoon fringe (you think that looking like Reese Witherspoon will make you feel better)... Never mind that you clearly do NOT know how to cut hair AND you don't look ANYTHING like Reese Witherspoon. All the while your children watch and ask what you are doing... to which you quickly respond that they are NEVER, EVER to cut their own hair...
You finish the job and stand back... Then... you cry... Reese Witherspoon... what were you thinking???... You're not even blond... HELLO!!!...
You're husband gets home and after hearing about your day rushes out to get a pregnancy test... As the positive result slowly starts to show you are BOTH grateful to learn that no, you are not on the verge of a mental breakdown... Science CAN explain this one...
You consider buying or ordering a t-shirt with the following statement on the front AND back: Beware of Hormonally Imbalanced Female
**Some descriptions embelished for humor--particularly in the case of crying but the hair thing, that's pretty much how it happened.
***This top 10 is based on first month experiences just prior to discovering my pregnancy. It just took me a while to actually get the picture downloaded on the computer and take the time to work on the post and publish (despite this being written in February).
5 comments:
I love the way you relate experiences; you are always able to find the humor in a situation and I always find myself laughing along! I received your package today, thank you! That was so kind of you. I will be sending a proper thank you card soon but I wanted to let you know that I got it.
MISS YA!
Funny! And congrats (due date?)Bangs are in! I think they look good on you. You should just get them filled in a little more (like Reese). And I have absolutely brought pictures of Reese in for my hair appointments. Even if I'm not a blonde, I think face shape is a better comparison for what will look good on you.
Yeah for you... you got it posted! Very funny... especially love the pictures with the bangs... of course I have seen the bangs first hand in person.... both on the good days and on the bad. Pictures make every story more interesting. Can't wait to find out what you are having!
-me
I'm so excited that you are pregnant and to share your top ten joys of this experience. And extra excited that I'm only sharing your joy through your blog and not sharing with a baby in my belly. I always thought your bangs looked good. And no you are not Reese Witherspoon....you are better!
You are so funny...and congrats on the pregnancy. I am pregnant too w/ #5. Crazy, I know. What am I thinking? I am due the end of Oct, beginning of Nov.
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